Day 104 – Finding Strength in Therapy

Day 104

Most of my life, I hid—behind video games, TV shows, and routines that numbed me. They let me escape from reality, from rejection, from the pain of never feeling like I fit in. For years, I thought distraction was survival.

But distraction isn’t living.

At 104 days sober, I don’t need to escape anymore. I’ve learned to sit in silence, to face the uncomfortable truths about who I am and where I’ve been. Therapy taught me that—something I never thought I’d say.

Growing up, therapy was “weak,” something people whispered about with shame. But when I was alone in that RV, stuck in my head and unable to move, it became my only lifeline. Virtual sessions gave me someone to talk to when I had no one else.

Now, I sit on a couch in person, talking to someone I trust—a friend, really. It’s my time to unpack the loops in my mind, the fears I hold onto, and the hopes I’m scared to admit. Therapy helps me understand myself in ways I never could before.

And while I’ve made progress, I’m not done fighting. I still battle the insecurities that addiction masked for years. I’m scared of what’s next. I want the family I saw in Hope’s eyes. I want to prove to myself that I don’t have to give up this time.

It’s not easy, but I know this:

We can’t change the past, but we can fight for the future. If you’re struggling, don’t be afraid to seek help. You might just find the lifeline you didn’t know you needed.

One Step. One Punch. One Round. 🌹

—Your Fellow Traveler in Recovery